Have you ever had a person in your life who seemed to have a power over you that you couldn't explain? Like they had some sort of way of always getting what they want from you and always grabbing your attention no matter what may be preoccupying you at the moment.
If not, consider yourself somewhat lucky. If so, then you understand exactly what I mean.
His name I won't say, but he's got a power over me that seems to be my own form of kryptonite.
He and I met January of this year during my second semester at university. We met at the local dance club and he "swept me off my feet." He was a great dancer, a smooth talker and my friends thought he was good looking. He invited me and my friend back to his apartment and never tried anything shady; all we did was talk and learn about each other. We hung out again the next night at his apartment again and we hung out with his friends and played video games and just had simple fun. Things seemed to be going just like my very own fairytale. He would compliment me. He wanted to get to know me. He let me get to know him. He would always text me back, no matter what. He would even text me first sometimes. He wanted me to meet his friends. He cared about how I felt. He wanted to spend time with me. He wanted to talk to me. That lasted for a few weeks.
Since then its been as rocky as the Rocky Mountains. He likes me then he doesn't. He wants to see me, then he doesn't. He talks to me then he doesn't. I'd try to stay strong each time another "doesn't" rolled around. I'd ignore his messages. I'd date other guys. But nothing ever lasted. After a few days of ignoring him, the "kryptonite" would begin to get to me, I'd fold and then go right back to where we started.
Frankly I'm sick of it. Every time I seem to finally get him out of my mind and get on with my life is when he decides that he wants to pop back into it. The power that he possesses over me causes me to break things off with guys I may be dating, causes me to feel a longing inside that he chooses to only fill for so long. I'm sick of blowing off other nice guys because he wants to see me. I'm sick of wanting to be with him even when we are separated by miles and miles. I'm sick of having to miss him. I'm sick of having to get him out of my mind all over again. I'm sick of constantly being let down. I just wish I knew how to overcome this power he has over my heart, because my mind just doesn't understand why he does it and why it can't stop it. And I don't know if it ever will.
I just hope I can be as strong as Superman.
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